What Is It ?

Almost every time I think about my life, I experience a mix of regret, smiles, and chuckles. Most importantly, I reflect on the things I shouldn’t have done. Every minute of every hour and every hour of each day, I am on a quest for answers to questions that don’t exist—questions that relate to our identity and our place in this grandiose world.

Human beings are complex creatures, but their complexity is as unique as their simplicity. One man cries at a death; another laughs harder inside. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Death and life are two sides of the coin, but what lies in the middle is what makes the most difference. This middle ground is where we differ. This middle ground defines who we are.

I want to relive today, but to what extent is that possible? I want to go back to yesterday, but is that realistic? What makes my today different from yesterday? I want to know the next move in this middle ground game—the move that makes me win. Where is the win? What if there is a perfect move? What happens after it? What if there isn’t? Worse still, what if moving wasn’t an option?

Is being lost a valid feeling? What happens when you have nowhere to go or don’t know if there is such a thing as somewhere? We fail to universally accept that direction is what defines the path we follow.

Follow and justify, do and reason, cause and consequence. These are just some of the ways mankind builds the blocks of the game. Have you ever done something without reason, supported a cause without a consequence, followed a path without justification, or achieved a goal without a strategy? To belong, to reside, and to be part of something is a key challenge for many—from the rich to the poor, the educated to the illiterate. How far does this belonging reach? How does it feel not to belong?

Does belonging have limits, or do we set our own limits for it? If that’s true, there must be a point at which we don’t want this affinity, this sense of belonging, or what some may call inclusion. At that point, can we be sure that we are set free? Even if we are, what is it that we’re free from? Is this freedom as liberating as one wants it to be?

Freedom makes us do things that were unthinkable, bringing us closer to ourselves yet setting us apart from others. It’s a freedom beyond the bare definition of freedom—a freedom with infinite opportunities and equally infinite unfortunate events. Limits are made to be broken, just like rules. That’s the whole reason they exist.

It’s still surprising that even our freedom isn’t the same for all of us, despite our constant, universal need for inclusion. Someone’s act of emancipation is another’s act of restraint. Is there a neutral act that doesn’t exist—either free or trapped? In this race for the survival of the fittest, we often forget about the in-betweener—the one who runs the race not to win or lose, not to defeat. They are just part of the game with an almost unknown purpose.

If you’re able to find this purpose, I’ll be impressed—not because you’re enlightening people who don’t know about it, but because you’re certain that you’ve found it. Until then, keep chasing it… identify it, define it, reason it, and then contradict it until it is nothing...